Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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