none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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