Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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