I wanna bring you to show and tell
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
