so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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