i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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