I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Randomize
