Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
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