return my video game
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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