Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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