was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
