do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
