No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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