Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
