Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
