think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
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