Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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