I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
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