After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
