I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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