WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
cat food counts as protein by the way
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Randomize
