weddingsv make me drug and hornr
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
