went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize