HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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