Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Who died my cat blue again?
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
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