you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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