i don't like sucking hair
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
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