i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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