I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
