we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
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