so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I hope mine doesn't look like that
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
