He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize