I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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