I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
