to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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