Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
