return my video game
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize