What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
i would one night stand the shit outta him
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
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