DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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