hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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