I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
is this the sara with the beer cane?
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
