Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
