I think i peed on brittanys purse
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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