My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
