All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
