if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
