haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Randomize