No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
