I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
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Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
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He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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