dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Randomize
